The Price of Falling in Love

[Synistergrrl]

~Anger, rage, violence, it was all that Az could think about. He stayed the wolf, it was easier. Fen was with him, running, hunting, killing. But it wasn't enough. He needed more, so when they came up on the campers, it was a bloodfest. Azazel was the angel of death in that moment and he took out all of his frustration on the group of teenagers making it last way into the night. By morning, he was padding home with Fenris. It had been a long time since his brother had seen that type of violence from Az. He was quiet as they drew closer to the hive. And finally he spoke, or well communicated as wolves do.~

I made a mistake, Fenris. I should never have trusted a fucking leech.

~His head snapped towards his brother then and he stopped, staring at the younger of the two. For a moment he just sized his brother up.~

Trace is different, isn't he?

~His head cocked a bit.~

He's idealistic... like you... but if he betrays us, or you... I'll fucking take his god damned fangs...

~He snarled the words but sighed as he sat down staring at where the warehouses lay out before them. He sat there, quietly, staring off for a bit until he just lay down. Even after all that violence, he was still feeling the hole that Em had left in his heart. he sighed softly, laying his maw on his paws. It was a defeated sort of stance, one that should break Fen's heart.~

He never really trusted me... not really... the loyalty is.... nonexistant. I put my trust, faith in him... and got nothing for it. I should have known better, Fen. I put our whole pack in danger... and what do we have to show for that? Yes we got the cub back, but now we know the vampires can't be trusted and the ideal is lost.... Em doesn't even seem to understand that.

[LittleDeadGrrl]

-Fenris ran with him, accepted the violence, nuzzling into Az when he was given the chance. Baring his throat easily to his older brother. He'd not seen his brother so upset in a long long time. It was rare and he knew Em had left a deep hole. He moved in closer, the pure white wolf, nuzzling a bit into him as he sighed speaking softly ... -

You cannot close yourself off from everyone ... you told me that ...

-He mirrored the words he'd told Fenris so long ago when the wolf had been tired of always being hit and wounded by the other wolves who considered him strange and some sort of freak. He shrugged when asked if Trace was different but then Fen did something new, unexpected, his head dipped low and dangerous ... -

Trace will always be mine to deal with. No matter his betrayal ... it will be me ...never hurt him brother ...

-He knew Az meant that he'd always protect Fen from anything, even from Trace, but Fenris felt a deep bond to the vampire. He moved in licked across his face nipping affectionately-

He won't betray us ...

-He frowned and spoke softly ... -

I'm not sure Em did either ...

-His head dipped this time in submission speaking softer ... -

You're both so stubborn Az. Maybe he tried to trust you. Maybe he didn't have a choice. I don't know. The ideal was never there ... we both know we shouldn't trust only the individual ... not the group ...

-He sat down beside him nuzzling into his brother-

We got that old stupid vampire for it too ... Never seems content.

-He sighed softly-

It hurts me to see you like this ... come on ... we can go find some nice kinfolk for you.

-He smiled a bit trying to get him to smile but he knew it wouldn't work. Not really. He knew Az needed time but Fenris wasn't going to let him spend these moments of pain alone. He'd talk or be quiet. It didn't matter. Whatever his brother needed. No matter how much they fought or disagreed in those eyes Az could see one thing. Trust. Love. Loyalty that'd not be broken, maybe not even in death-

[Synistergrrl]

~Az rolled his eyes when the wolf told him not to close himself off. But he knew what Fenris meant and then he was a little surprised, but he smirked with how protective Fen was over the vampire.~

No... I don't think he will....

~He sighed those words and then he growled.~

He betrayed ME... Fen. I always told him the truth. He KEPT what he knew from me... lied to ME about what was going on. Had he talked to me, tried to explain things, instead of just assuming how things would go down. I'd never have done that if it had been a vampire kidnapped by one of ours and I knew... I'd have told him. It wasn't about betraying all of us, Fen... it was about betraying me and what he and I were suppose to have.

~He growled the last part. His heart was wounded. He wasn't so pissed that em had loyalty to Phillip, hell he had loyalty to the Hive, but to just by pass him completely, lie to him and assume he'd be fine with that, then so be it. He shook his head about Nikolai.~

That vampire is nothing but trouble... Never should fucking put him out in the sun to burst into flame... You can smell it.. you best keep Trace from him... I know you can sense that he's wrong...

~He sighed a bit, but then pushed Fenris.~

no... no kinfolk... noone.. not for a while, Fen... I can't...

~He pushed up slowly from the ground and looped back down towards the warehouses and the hive. As they entered where Trace and his pack was, they both found the Ductus waiting for them. He was sitting on the steps and as the two wolves entered he stood up. Az stopped and Trace nodded.~

He left... for good... I don't think he'll be back for a while...

~Az felt the fur bristle along his back but he just lowered his head and gave a snort before padding off to enter the hive. He left Fenris to talk to Trace alone. Trace watched and then moved in closer to Fenris.~

We need to talk Fen...

[LittleDeadGrrl]

-Fenris padded back with his brother hating to see him in such pain but there was nothing he could do for him. No salve or medicine that would make this kind of pain go away. He frowned when he heard Em was gone. He'd not truly expected it, he'd hoped the vampire would patch things up with Az but it looked like that wasn't going to be happening and everyone needed to stay out of Az's way for a long long time. Fenris shifted back to human stretching slowly, naked and dirty, before he moved to put on pants he'd left at the entrance. He tugged them on before moving to Trace staring up at the stunning vampire-

I'm sorry he left ... are you ok?

-He knew Trace loved Em as well before he nodded-

What is it?

-He asked slowly and suddenly with a bit of mistrust hoping he wasn't about to get a break up speech ... -

[Synistergrrl]

~Trace watched Az leave and then he reached out and brushed some dirt from Fen's cheek. He smiled, tugged the wolf in closer and claimed his lips.~

I'm okay... I think he's a fool for leaving, he could work things out... but he's a stubborn old fool... Come on...

~He tugged Fenris back up the steps to the room he'd claimed as his own. He dropped onto the bed, only to drag Fenris down with him.~

With everything that has happened, I have to make a decision. If I stick by Phillip and the Sabbat, then that makes things very difficult for me and you. Phillip has fucked up and he's going to call down the powers that be on his head.

~He sighed and then brushed back the blond hair.~

So I'm breaking from him and the Sabbat. I'm going to give my pack the option of staying with me or going with them. I'd rather be with you and free, Fen, then wondering when the axe is going to fall.

~But then he seemed to grow serious as he stared at Fen.~

I'll have a big ole target on my back. I won't go back to the Camerilla, the Anarchs won't trust me, and I'm betraying the Sabbat... without Em... it makes me a bit of a lone wolf, no pun intended. Em told me to stay away from Nikolai... and he's right... but... it's better to have a very strong vampire in your corner then none at all.

~He was watching Fenris to see how the wolf would react. He knew what he was about to do was going to make him a pariah. But joining forces with Nikolai would mean that he had backup and maybe a place among the vampires instead of just being an outcast.~

[LittleDeadGrrl]

-Fenris was tugged up smirking as he went before he fell on the bed. He crawled on top of Trace straddling his body beneath his own as he began to kiss along his neck, biting at his ear, before he pulled back listening intently for a moment-

Do ... is that what you want? To stick by him?

-He reached out tugging the hand that brushed through his blond hair kissing the palm slowly before he went on. Fenris smiled when he said he was breaking away from the Sabbat. Staying with him. It was all he wanted. He nodded about the pack although he honestly didn't care one way or another. He cared about Trace. His eyes darkened visibly, fangs grew a touch as he mouth become a little more wolfish as did he eyes as he growled ... -

You aren't alone. You have me and no one will touch you ...

-He frowned as he continued-

You mean join with that vampire? I don't know ... won't he want revenge on you?

-He reached out claiming his lips slowly ... -

You don't need him. You have me ...

-He paused ... -

... but you want to go to him don't you? I ... whatever you decide I'll back you but you can't go talk to him without me. I need to find out exactly how Never has him under control ... I don't like it though. The older any of us gets the crazier we get and he is old ...